Finding the Christmas Spirit in India

As an American who has spent much of my adult life living outside the United States, I have a great love for learning about and experiencing other cultures. This led me to spend 11 years in the U.S. Foreign Service where I had the privilege of experiencing life in the UK, Israel and the Philippines. (I used to joke that I didn’t live in Europe – the UK clearly is not Europe, the Middle East – ditto Israel which is very different from its MENA neighbors, or Asia – the Philippines is SO culturally distinct from other East Asian states.) There are many countries where a tour of duty did not materialize – including Canada (Montreal), France, Italy, Iran and India.

My great love affair with India started long before my first trip more than 26 years ago. So it was very important to me to travel with my husband to India in December 2025 – to give him a small taste of the country and the culture. It was a wonderful, memorable trip for both of us. I do not claim expert status on India – and am sharing a memories of our trip at the request of friends who have asked about the experience.

To me, a visit to India is not complete without a trip to the nation’s capital New Delhi, and this is where our trip started. New Delhi has a number of amazing hotels; over my years in the corporate bubble I was fortunate to stay at the Taj Mahal hotel, at One Mansingh Road. I was the trip planner for my husband’s first India trip, and splurged on a one night stay at the Taj Mansingh to ensure that my husband’s Delhi stay would be as comfortable as possible after the journey.

Over the years I have experienced the wonderful inclusive spirit of India in December. I remember, for example, after visiting Bangalore in 2004 as a conference key note speaker and later receiving a Christmas Card from the wonderful Leela Palace Bangalore Hotel staff dressed in their Saris and posing in front of a huge Christmas Tree. (I may have the card in my Hannukah box and will add it here if I find it. It was definitely a keeper.)

Hindus greeting a Jew for Christmas – non-ironically. That for me is India in a nutshell – the ability to enjoy and assimilate foreign cultures without losing their own.

Whenever I have traveled to India in December I have come to expect and enjoy the Christmas decorations. It is something that I have come to take for granted. I did not think to mention this to my husband and he may have been taken by surprise by the sheer quantity and variety of Christmas decorations – and the occasional Channukia (Chanukah candelabra).

Every nook and cranny was decorated, every meal in the hotel restaurant featured Christmas tableware. So we had our wonderful Indian breakfast with delicious coffee in Santa Claus mugs. If it was in the United States it could have been suffocating, to be honest. In India the seasonal immersion in Christmas is charming to me. The Taj Mansingh Christmas decorations in the lobby – shown above and below – provide a taste of the experience.

So that is my first vignette from our December trip. We had one full day in New Delhi, spent with dear longtime friends, visits to a wonderful new museum and old favorite venues – which I will circle back to in due course.

More to come!

Quick Tip: Peeling Thin-Skinned Avocados

So this Quick Tip post is inspired by my husband’s enthusiastic recommendation and our shared love of avocados.

Living here in Zichron Ya’akov we are fortunate that most of our fruits and vegetables are grown locally. I am old enough to remember eating mainly what was in season in my childhood. And we enjoy following the rhythm of the local growing seasons here. Of course it is made easier by the climate and our location, living in the midst of organic farms and wineries.

Avocados are one of our personal favorites. They are delicious in salads, with Mexican food, added to a pita or crumpet, or on their own with balsamic vinegar or just a squeeze of fresh lemon. They are nutritional powerhouses. And we have a surprisingly long avocado season.

At the moment we are enjoying avocados that look like the Haas variety with wonderful flavor, texture and thick skins. They are very easy to peel and store well (refrigerated) when ripe.

Israel has a number of different avocado types – who knew? Some of the time we find thin-skinned varieties in the market, and they are more difficult to peel without waste.

Some weeks ago, that was the situation. The avocados were ripe, thin-skinned and difficult to peel without making a mess. Without thinking I picked up my ceramic peeler and found that it made peeling ripe thin-skinned avocados a breeze.

A day or two later, my husband walked in on me peeling a thin-skinned avocado with my vegetable peeler like I had been doing it my whole life. He was surprised and even fascinated by my small innovation.

My personal spouse of over 36 years is not easily impressed. “You have to share that on YouTube,” he declared, “or wherever it is that you put things online.” (That is the most attention he has given the Second Middle Age blog, and it was my turn to be surprised.)

Sometimes I find myself just doing something that seems obvious to me – without any thought or preconceived notion that it may be a novel approach. This was one of those times. If you get a chance to try it, I would love to hear how it goes!

In Memoriam: Garden Recollections of Menuhah (Suzanne) Peters (May 22, 1956 – October 24, 2025)

Menuhah Peters was the best early educator I ever had the privilege to know and to call my friend. This morning I have just learned the sad news of her passing from 6000+ miles away, and so am writing to share a few recollections.

Menuhah made a huge and lasting impression on the world through her early education teaching and what she shared about it online (photos always shared with written consent). For Menuhah every setting was a classroom and every experience an opportunity for learning and teaching. I was fortunate enough that this included my garden.

Menuhah exemplified the mantra of renowned educator Professor Reuven Feuerstein (z”l) who taught me that the only limitation on learning is lifespan.

Over the last several years that my family lived in Cleveland Park, Washington DC, I hosted Manuhah’s class a number of times. I don’t recall how it started but it always brought joy.

Below are some of the photos of their visits and the amazing way that Menuhah amplified our experiences in her classroom. Her photos and captions convey the essence of the experience; this morning I am feeling sad and lack words to add much to her descriptions.

Spring Bulbs

Young Impressionists

By the way, the cover photo (above) of the kids drawing tulips in our front garden was part of Menuhah’s Impressionist unit. And based on their drawings, they got it. (What genre of art did you study in pre-school?)

Encouraging Young Gardeners

Some of Menuhah’s posts remind me of long forgotten events, like harvesting seeds from purple globe thistles (echinops ritro) to give to the children. In the post below she celebrates the plant that one student was able to grow from the seeds. (After seeing her post I found a few photos of how I had packaged the seeds, also included below.)

Anyone who knew Menuhah should not be surprised that she kept meticulous records of the activities and accomplishments of her students – contemporaneously and for years afterwards!

Decorations with Pumpkin Leaves

When our time together coincided with Jewish holidays, she found a way to use materials from my garden in the classroom. Below are a few ways that she used pumpkin leaves as Sukkot decorations – one of which she gave to me to use in our Sukkah:

Celebrating Changes of Season

For Menuhah, everything was additive: she brought her class over at different times of year to see the progression of the garden and transition of seasons; here they are arriving to my impromptu pumpkin patch:

Thank You Cards

And as if all of that did not bring enough joy, Menuhah also delivered by hand – and accompanied by her young students – handmade thank you cards that I have valued and kept over the intervening years and miles that separated us.

Stealth Crocuses

We had one other very meaningful gardening experience planting crocus bulbs in a small corner of the Adas Israel front lawn in November 2013. My understanding is that the crocuses bloomed annually, ever since, as captured below by Menuhah in 2017. I hope that the crocuses may have naturalized and spread, to serve as an enduring memorial to Menuhah’s invaluable contribution to Adas Israel. I would love to hear from anyone who may have seen them in bloom over the years.

May Menuhah’s memory be an everlasting blessing. Baruch Dayan HaEmet.

Are You Counting what Really Matters?

There is a truism that what we count matters. Where and when we have clear metrics, it is easier for us to place value. The problem is that some things are harder to count than others.

Diet and exercise are two areas that are relatively easy to track, and where counting really matters. Every day, for example, my smart watch tracks my health through established benchmarks (steps, minutes of exercise, standing time).

Apple Watch
My Apple Watch tracks key health parameters.

It turns out that when my watch tracks these metrics, I actually adjust my behaviors to reach set benchmarks. In other words, my watch counts my steps and that supports my long-term health. This counting adds value to my life and really matters.

At the same time, we need to value intangibles. Intangibles like family, friendship, contributions to our communities, and our spiritual / religious commitments defy easy measurement. Yet they add essential meaning and value to our lives. As Albert Einstein said:

“Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.”

Arguably the most important decision that a person can make is how to spend their discretionary time.

How we choose to spend our time shows what matters most to us. How many hours of your day are within your total control? And how do you spend that time.

Every day we make choices. What are yours?

What are you counting?

Navigating the Global Governance Crisis

We are living in a time of crisis for the rule of law and governance around the world.

When I lived in the Philippines in the 1990s, democracy was fragile. Each election carried the risk of renewed dictatorship. It was hard to escape the realization that the warm, hardworking and creative people of the Philippines deserved better governance.

Now in 2025 that applies to nearly every country in the world, including Israel. We are living through a crisis of global governance. There is a reason why people see echoes of the 1930s in our politics today.

It is particularly challenging here in Israel where we have been living in parallel realities for years. We also face the consequences of the poor decision making across the MENA region and internationally.

At times it feels as though all of the adults have left the room. At the individual level, people live in media silos, believing”facts” of dubious origin, driven by divisive partisans. This does not help the vast majority of the population anywhere, anytime. Yet, it is harder and harder to find common ground.

It may be a helpful step forward to first acknowledge the universality of the governance crisis. There is unfortunately no FOMO.

And we also need to recognize that we play a role in the drama, for good, or for ill. The solution, like the problem, does not lay outside of ourselves.

As Pogo famously said about the environmental crisis in 1970:

Walt Kelly, 1970 Earth Day Poster

It is easy to point fingers at public figures. Let’s instead focus on our own actions. We take decisions every day as to how to engage on challenging issues with friends, colleagues, family. These decisions can either dampen down conflict and heal divisions or make things worse.

I am going to take responsibility for whatever small impact I have in the world. I know that I can do better with my words and social media interactions.

This brings to mind something else that I first recall seeing in the Philippines: The Rotary Four Way Test:

Source: Rotary Club of Lansing, MI

To be fair, I have never been associated with an organization that actually implemented the Four-Way Test. But isn’t worth a try?

So here and now, I am making my own commitment to internalize these principles and to use them daily. Let’s see how I do.

Care to join me?

Or do you have a better idea?

The Truth: Others Don’t See Your Self Doubts and Insecurities

We can be our own harshest self-critics. And we assume (erroneously) that others share our negative thoughts and self-judgments. An epiphany dating back to my Southfield High School days helped free me from this damaging assumption. It also helped me ignore false judgments of others.

Southfield High School – with literally hundreds of students in each grade – was a big adjustment.

I was just an insecure 16 year old, uncertain about everything from my appearance to my place in the universe. I was not a great student and was not popular. I had spent nearly all of my education in small schools with small class sizes. My High School experience was the opposite of everything I had known before.

Moving from class to class at Southfield High School was a chaotic migration with hundreds of students crowding the hallways. Transferring between classes felt like swimming against a tide of oncoming waves of students. Every day I traversed a glass lined hallway connecting two buildings, a bottle-neck that was particularly crowded.

One day like any other, I found myself in a sea of students crossing the glass hallway in both directions. Suddenly I realized that of the hordes of students, literally no one was focused on me. Not a one. Whatever I felt insecure about was not lit up like a neon sign for others to see. They were just trying to get to class on time, and most felt just as insecure as me.

It hit me like lightning: if everyone else was as insecure as me, what did I have to worry about?

Later in my sophomore year, this helped me in the opposite situation to ignore the irrelevant judgments of others.

By this time I started to find my footing in the Debate/Forensics club. Like any extracurricular, the more you time and effort you put in, the more you get out of it. So I was spending more of my free time in the Debate room. Then a (not close) friend confronted me at my locker.

She presented me with an ultimatum. I needed to choose between debate and the sophomore girls that I had hung out with. I replied that I would go on with debate, and would see if they were my real friends. Looking back I am surprised that my 16 year old self had the presence of mind.

What would you have done?

The intervening years have not been free of doubt and self-judgment. Far from it. So this is a life lesson I return to again and again. Fortunately in most cases you get as many opportunities a lesson to learn as you need.

2nd Middle Age is a great time to take this lesson to heart.

Now just as then I understand that most people are unaware of our foibles and flaws. The reality is that virtually no one else cares about my – or your own – insecurities.

It is just another example of the Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) adage: Not everything you think is true.

And if it not true, why bother?

What experiences have you had that helped you to overcome negative self-talk and judgment?

What has helped you the most?

How Radical Acceptance Transforms Our Lives

The literal path to one of my yoga studios, March 2024

2nd Middle Age is a great time to adopt Radical Acceptance, an element of Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). There are many online resources where you can learn more about Radical Acceptance. For the uninitiated I will reprise briefly what I wrote here nearly 4 years back:

Radical Thinking is a way to accept without judgment your personal reality. If we can view our situation without judgment, we can accept our immediate circumstances and mitigate suffering.

With so much conflict and upheaval in the world today, we need Radical Acceptance now more than ever. I live in a country at war on multiple fronts, varying depending on the day and the week. I accept that I am powerless to change this reality, even while I try to contribute where I can. Accepting these circumstances without judgment is critical to my daily functioning.

The last few years also brought me to the realization of how deeply Radical Acceptance is embedded into traditional practices. As I wrote last week I draw support from both Jewish observance and my longtime Yoga practice. Religious faith at its core requires suspension of disbelief, and willingness to accept our circumstances without judgment.

This also applies to yoga. I do struggle with self-judgment in my yoga practice. My yoga teacher Shai Tam emphasizes the importance of accepting what we can do now without self-criticism. Writing these words, I realize that I also discussed this in a recent interview:

Yoga as Acceptance of Self,
July 2025

Just this morning, Shai said something that resonated with me in terms of with Radical Acceptance. It had such a startling clarity that I had to ask if I could quote him, and he agreed:

“Yoga is acceptance of everything that is happening at every given moment.”

Radical Acceptance helped me to gain perspective in a very dark period and supports now me through these challenging times. Of course past injuries run deep and leave scars. Still we can build better relationships with love, faith, trust and open communication.

We can each find our way to Radical Acceptance in manifold ways. I would love to hear how you see parallels in your own faith practices. How does it help you navigate in troubled waters?

Yoga for Emotional Resilience Amid Conflict

Since October 7th, I have seen many accounts of a renewed sense of belonging to the Jewish people.

Jewish observance has always been an important part of my life. It is amazing to be part of a warm, welcoming community during this terrible, seemingly endless conflict.

I also have taken great comfort in my longstanding Yoga practice.

A long-time friend and colleague shared with me years ago that Yoga helped her to find comfort in uncomfortable positions.

Lately I have reflected on her words, and the manifold benefits of yoga in these difficult times.

My amazing Yoga teacher Shai Tam and I recently talked about my experience of finding a feeling of comfort and safety in yoga, even during active alerts:

At times it feels like the whole world is upside down. It is as if we are living in the worst version of the multiverse.

What are you doing these days to feel a greater sense of comfort in uncomfortable times and spaces?

Stay safe wherever you are.

DIY Mosquito Repellent: Essential Oils for Skin Safety

A few weeks back I wrote about the importance of skin care in 2nd Middle Age here. Now I am revisiting the topic to surface another increasingly important form of skin protection important for human health.

As brief background, I have been studying the alarming increase in mosquito-borne viruses, also known as Arboviruses. Dengue Fever is the most dangerous mosquito-borne virus. Others include West Nile virus, chikungunya, yellow fever, and Zika virus. The global public health threat of arboviruses has grown exponentially over the last five years. This growth is partly due to more extreme weather events, and also influenced by adaptation of Aedes “Tiger” mosquitoes. Other factors, not yet well understood, also contribute to this threat. The bottom line: so-called tropical diseases are expanding to previously unaffected countries/regions, bringing with them increasing public health threats.

Because arboviruses are spread by mosquitoes and not from person to person, protection against mosquito bites is very important. Unlike typical mosquitoes active at dawn and dusk, Tiger Mosquitoes— known for their stripy design—bite during the day.

Tiger Mosquito on Skin, Source: https://www.invasive.org/browse/detail.cfm?imgnum=1366025

This means that just like sunscreen, it is important to protect your skin with mosquito repellent on a daily basis. Commercially manufactured mosquito repellents may be safe and effective. However, it is important to be careful about anything you apply to your skin. For background on choosing a safe mosquito repellent, you can review the Environmental Working Group (EWG) overview and guidance here.

Or you can do what I do, and make your own herbal mosquito repellent at home. They are easy to make at home using safe and effective essential oils with research behind them. There are many good options, the recipe below includes those that I use on a regular basis. Plant based alternatives to chemical-based insect repellents can highly effective. Personal experience may be the best guide to find a combination of essential oils that works best for you.

A 2011 research article from the Malaria Journal provides background on Lemon Eucalyptus, Citronella, Mint, among other essential oils. In fact, Citronella is an herbal combination itself. It may be as effective as DEET with up to 2 hours of protection. (Like sunscreen, mosquito protection should be reapplied every few hours for full protection.) My husband and I have carried out our own trial, so to speak. And on the few occasions that we forget to apply our mosquito repellent we have felt eaten alive. (No one was more surprised than my husband by the efficacy of the herbal spray.)

My Herbal Mosquito Repellent, with chicken-scratch label

Here is my recipe, which I offer without any guarantee or warranty:

Essential Oils Mosquito Repellent

Ingredients

Essential Oils: 20 Drops each of Citronella, Geranium, Tea Tree oil, Peppermint, Lemon Eucalyptus, and Cinnamon oil

1 1/2 Cups Distilled Water

Carrier: 1/2 cup Witch hazel 

Alternative Carriers:  Castor Oil, Witch Hazel or Vodka 

Instructions

  1. Assemble all your essential oils, together with several clean, small spray bottles and a clean measuring cup.
  2. Add 20 Drops Each of the following to your measuring cup: Citronella, Geranium, Tea tree oil, Peppermint, Lemon Eucalyptus, and Cinnamon Oil.
  3. Add Distilled water and Witch Hazel and blend well.
  4. Pour into clean spray bottles (shake before use).

Let me know if you do try this at home. Also, please share your own ideas and experiences with other essential oils. The important thing is to protect yourself and your loved ones.

The Dilemma of Champagne Socialists

Years ago when dinosaurs walked the earth, some of us were graduate students at what is now the Ford School of Government at University of Michigan. Thinking about public economic policy as we did, we would occasionally talk about Jo Six-pack , i.e., the average tax payer, as in: “What about Jo Six-pack?”

Lately I have been thinking a lot about how politicians so much love to present themselves as Jo Six-pack, regardless of the reality. The latest example? Nepo-baby and Champagne Socialist Zohran Mandami.

Mandami ran on a hard-left campaign for Mayor of New York – an actual ‘seize the means of production’ Socialist platform. During said campaign he filmed himself eating rice with his fingers to show his common touch. (“When you grow up as someone … especially in the 3rd world.”) This is the same guy who claimed African status on college applications. In reality his parents were the beneficiaries of British colonial rule in Uganda, where he was born. And his family still splits time between NY and their multi-million 2 acre compound located outside the capital Kampala.

Photo curtesy of the New York Post showing the happy couple with the panoramic backdrop of Lake Victoria.

Speaking of Uganda, you may have heard that Mandami decamped to Kampala for a lavish 3-day wedding celebration? (I am usually not the first to know these things.) The formerly “Defund the Police” Candidate partied inside the family’s 2-acre compound – with lavish gardens and Lake Victoria views – protected by “military style security, masked guards and a phone-jamming system.”

The 3-Day Uganda spectacle is Mandami’s 3rd celebration with his bride Rama Duwaji. This follows their engagement and wedding ceremony (Dubai, December 2024), and civil wedding ceremony (New York City, February 2025).

What about Jo Six-pack?